Ah, yes. The Sacred Institution of Marriage

If I hear one more “deeply religious” person tell me that the motivation behind same-sex marriages is the “tax break,” I am going to vomit. The core of that statement has a deeper, more sinister message. It implies that same-sex relationships are founded out of necessity and usership of our system–not out of love. It would be a slippery-slope for me to continue by thinking that perhaps gays and lesbians cannot even experience love because “it goes against nature.” Although, I recognize the logical fallacy of that claim, I bet there are others out there who don’t. Slippery-slope or not, there are those who would not stop there with their fuzzy logic and overgeneralizations . . . .

I am a straight, single male who has never been married–which, probably disqualifies me from making statements about gays, lesbians, and even married (I think we should call them “natural” –at least that is what THEY would prefer) couples. So, rather than talk about them, I am going to espouse some historical trivia about their precious institution called “marriage.”

Marriage was Based Upon Practical Reasons

Way back when, at the time marriages were founded, the ceremony held a dual role in society. There was the traditional role where a couple asks for communal recognition of their previously-existing relationship. The participants already HAD a relationship. They were simply asking for everyone else to recongnize it.

In addition, marriage had a practical side to it. As the kids got married, it became time for them to move out of their parents’ houses and get a place of their own. So, the entire community would assemble together and give them gifts–all of the things necessary to maintain/run a household. Couple that with a nice dowry, and voila–parents could get the spare room and the office back–all in a good weekend.

The idea that their relatioship is being “blessed” by God was tacked on somewhere by the men in charge. A religious element probably existed somewhere as part of the process because many early communities were formed around spiritual groups, but the ceremony of marriage itself was really devised for practical reasons.

Does Anyone Actually Know Someone who Married for Tax Reasons?

I guess the other big question that I have about the sanctity of marriage relates to a story that has been quoted to me more times than I can count about two little old ladies . . . .

Invariably, the discussion begins with the concept of same-sex relationships, and the return shot is about the tax breaks. How it is not right to use the God-granted institution of marriage for the associated tax breaks. The next step in the argument is then about two, mythical old ladies who wanted to get married-for the tax breaks. Someone thinks that is fine, and someone else thinks it is terrible. My point is: I think it is a lie!

I have heard about the mythical grannies, but have never met anyone from that generation that would mix sexual mores and their reputation for a taxbreak! In all probability, they woukd be a likely group of career taxpayers who would pay more taxes to keep their reputation clean. After all, we are talking about the “Leave it to Beaver” generation with their white-washed reality and no camera shots of the bedroom,

I also have a message for the “au naturale” couples:

If you are married for the tax breaks, go see a counselor. You are an idiot and a loser, and you need spiritual cleansing/replacement treatment, you need to engage the cerebral portions of your brain (go ahead, plug them in–even for a minute–it wont hurt you), and you must cease and desist projecting your inadequecies onto others.

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